As the firstborn, I’ve had to “fight” for pretty much everything I wanted in my life:

  • My first outing with my friends
  • My first overnight BBQ
  • My right to wear lipstick
  • My right to keep my hair long
  • My right to wear contact lenses
  • My right to pursue the Arts steam I wanted (including intentionally failing science so I cannot have a destiny forced onto me).

For the most part, I’ve stood up for what I wanted knowing that the things that matters to me wouldn’t be granted if I didn’t speak up, ask for it, or stand by my decisions (and the consequences).

I used to be so resentful of being the firstborn — of being the pioneer/ trailblazer/ whatever you call it.

Nobody knows as much as I do how difficult it has been being and remaining a Sexologist in Singapore for so long (13 years and counting).

I’ve seen several sex toy shops, as well as sex-positive/ wannabe sex educators in Singapore come and go. If I hadn’t gone through what I went through during my formative years and beyond, I wouldn’t have the “balls” to begin much less keep at it. Sometimes my friends joke about it but it’s true, I have “bigger balls”…

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Dr. Martha Tara Lee, Sexpert — D.H.S., M.A.

Relationship Counselor and Clinical Sexologist of Underneath The Moon. AASECT Cert Sexuality Educator Supervisor. Author of 4 books. www.ErosCoaching.com